i wake up.
drop off the demons at daycare
by having me a drink so life don’t feel so unfair
swat the wasp
of anxiety buzzing around my skin
i hear it in my ears but it don’t stick the stinger in.
then i spend a little time in my personal detention
when i fuck up & betray all my goddamn good intentions.
spend a little time getting to know myself
& i realize that i’m living in a self inflicted hell.
don’t have answers
all i have are excuses
but i wear fear like a scar & all my regrets like bruises
& the truth is
i really just want to go home
& the truth is sooner or later, i’ll end up on my own.
when i’ll spend a little time in my personal detention
cause i fucked up & betrayed all my goddamn good intentions
spend a little time getting to know myself &
i realize that i’m living in a self inflicted hell.
fuck you, for everything in your past.
you can grow & change but you can never take back
fuck you, never learned to cut loose.
i’m at the end of my rope so tie it into a noose.
cause i’ve spent a little time in my personal detention.
& let me tell you it don’t look a goddamn thing like heaven
i’ve spent too much time getting to know myself
& i know now that i’m living in a self inflicted hell.
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